The Pursuit of Happiness
Happiness comes from solving the problems
Problem-solving is a journey — an endless activity throughout our lives. There can never be a situation where we have no problems.
Let’s say you’re a mediocre university student with average academic performance and hardly any programming skills. During an existential crisis, you’ve determined to become a Software Engineer after graduation and to be a good performer in academics. For the betterment of your life, you’ve upgraded your problems to the next level. To be a good academic performer, you need to study hard and make some sacrifices. To pursue a career in Software Engineering, you need to start studying programming, build software applications, participate in hackathons, and so on and so forth. These new activities will bring us new problems to tackle, but these are good problems to solve and worthwhile.
Therefore, wherever we are and whatever we are doing, we will be constantly bombarded with problems. We need to have the courage to face and solve the good problems. Avoiding or ignoring problems will itself appear as a problem that we will eventually have to face, making us miserable. Never wish for a life without any problems because it does not exist; instead, let’s wish for a life full of good problems.
While facing problems, it is inevitable that we must undergo suffering and struggles. Challenging and overcoming these are what actually generate happiness, growth, and opportunities. As we understand this, we will accept reality and prepare to go through those difficult times.
Good Values
Values define us. Values are what we prioritize our life around. They are the foundation of our actions and behaviors. So, it’s essential to nurture good values within ourselves, as they lead to good problems that are easier to solve and ultimately result in a better life.
Good values are socially constructive, within our control, and can be immediately experienced within ourselves in the world as it is, allowing us to engage with them throughout our lives.
As in the previous example, you’ve prioritised becoming a Software Engineer — nothing more, nothing less. Thus, you’ve started working on your programming skills, participating in hackathons, learning new things with a deep desire to grow, and so on. This desire is what keeps pushing you forward and fuels your journey.
Let’s say you’ve achieved this goal. As you envisioned, you’ve become a Software Engineer. What’s next? All the momentum, motivation, inspiration, and deep desire to learn — the very things that drove you all these days — would fade because the goal you focused on has been completed, leaving nothing to push you forward.
Goals are not values, and it is not wise to prioritize our lives around them. They are short-term, and once achieved, all the momentum you’ve built will be lost.
So, what could have been done better here?
Prioritize Good Values and Growth-oriented Mindset
Goals are finite — once achieved, their motivation disappears. Values, however, are infinite — they provide a lifelong source of meaning and direction.
When you prioritize a goal, you are working towards a destination. When you prioritize a value, you are embracing a way of being that constantly fuels growth.
In that example, we could have prioritized continuous improvement through continuous learning and work. These values would have kept us motivated and fueled our journey.
Goals are like checkpoints, but values are like fuel — they keep you moving beyond any single achievement. If you prioritize the right values, you’ll never run out of motivation, because your journey will always have purpose.
What Are Your Values?
- Expressing honesty, responsibility, humility, compassion etc.
- Continuous improvement through continuous learning
Let’s not play the victim card or deny and ignore problems as if they do not exist. We are not entitled, special, or great — everyone faces similar challenges. Instead, let’s be humble, accept that we are mediocre, and strive for improvement in the work we do. Nevertheless, it’s never too late to prioritize good values and a growth mindset.
Thank you Mark Manson for your inspiring thoughts.
